Every day that I am alive, people surprise and amaze me. Unfortunately there are also people who disappoint me but lucky for you, this post is not about them!
I was reminded the other day by someone that I respect and admire, that we as human beings tend to put more effort and time into some friendships more than others.
I think I do that very thing. I put more effort into some relationships more than others. Whether it be family or friends, respect and reciprocity are two critical factors in a strong relationship. I have to admire or respect my friends in some way and the effort I put in to our relationship has to be reciprocated.
Sometimes, this means that certain friendships are lost or people grow apart, but to quote a popular poem, we have friends for a reason, a season or a lifetime.
I’ve been thinking a lot about my friendships lately. Reevaluating the difference between a really quality friendship and a “convenient” friendship. I think I tend to keep “friends” in both categories but am sad when I realize that certain friends fall into the convenient category.. but when the friend fits into the quality category, I just feel so lucky.
I had a chat with a great friend last week. A convenient friendship that has since evolved into quality. Something I didn’t expect. I also had a great chat with a close friend today. I was reminded that even though we haven’t spent a lot of time together over the past few months due to her new relationship, we still have a bond that is really solid and a level of trust and respect that is amazing.
While at Second Cup with that friend, we were waiting for my drink and the two women behind the counter at Second cup kept saying “Pssssssssssssssssst” to get my attention. When I finally turned around, they commented “By the way, you look Great!!!”. I was so flattered and it really made my afternoon. See? People amaze me! I almost don’t know how to react anymore though. Can it really get that much better? Not that I think I am perfect, but how much more amazed can people be when they see me? The changes (at least to me) seem so minor now.
Anyway, I am also amazed by a particular individual that I have been working with lately. By the way, by amazed, I don’t mean in a good way. This particular individual is married and as we all know, I am single.. and I am sure (I hope) he isn’t intentionally trying to make me uncomfortable but I have been on the receiving end of a whole lot of flirting lately. Who knows, he could be innocently thinking he is being clever and funny etc.. but after making a comment about buying me lunch.. or dinner, I just think there is an invisible line that is being stepped over slightly. (I have received a second opinion on this from a friend as well!)
The thing is, I would never ever ever even consider going for lunch or dinner with this guy. As a single woman, his behavior towards me has been borderline and quite frankly, even if he thinks it is innocent, going out for lunch (or dinner for that matter) with a married man isn’t a situation I want to be a part of. In a group, it isn’t the same thing but just one on one? If the situation was different and I was the wife, I know how I would feel.. I would rather be single forever than be a home wrecker.
Don’t get me wrong, this guy is very nice and charming and has never physically done anything to compromise the situation, but sometimes innuendo can be a really cloudy enigma. I just think being a single woman puts me in a situation where I have to be super careful how I take comments and flirting that I receive. It is hard to hear the flirts and comments because I am actually desiring that sort of attention from men in my personal life and when it is offered in a situation where you’re not supposed to be receiving it, there is awkwardness!
On a side note, I have noticed a plethora of married men not wearing wedding rings.. Just reminds me that there is no way to know for sure so I have to assume they are all married! Men, Wear your rings!
Anyway… I think that people are fascinating. I honestly should have gone into psychology because I am just so amazed at the human brain and would love to study why people do the things they do. Maybe that’s what makes me so crazy in the dating scene… I am so wrapped up in why people tick that I overanalyze things and drive myself nuts!
Ooooh completely off topic, I almost forgot to mention… March 30th is supposed to be the Premiere episode of Glutton for Punishment on the Food Network. Some of you may remember that during Stampede last summer I watched Bob Blumer break the Guinness Book of World Records record for most pancakes made in an hour.. and being that I was there at the taping, I inevitably ended up being filmed and unless there is a lot of editing, I should be on the show!!! I am hoping to PVR it on my computer! I guess I have had more than 15 minutes of fame but I’ve been having fun :)
To sum all of this up, I really don’t have anything profound to say. I wish I could say something cool or clever that makes all of this become homogenous but really, it just is what it is. It may make me seem like a really messed up single woman and that would be mostly true, but is also just reiterates that people are unpredictable and nothing is ever truly known for sure.
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